Dear diary..

Dear hafiz, You got a new job. More promising. With just single interiew (or can i say a meeting), you passed it, and was proudly sent the offer letter. Wow. Woow. I'm proud of yu my sweet darling. Decision on decision, quitting this current job is not that easy tho. I knw how y feel, i know how yo days and night filled with fears and confusion. But, i believe yu. Yo decision would never be wrong. Just remember, I will always got your back, no matter what. Whatever happens. Regards, Iznee sofi

My new crib!

Hoyeah.best gile ok.best best! Tp humm bole tahan jaoh aaa jugak hukm. Tp antam sajja la. Yg aku tahu..kalo friday mmg tak balek uma..mmg tros shhooooott g kota dsara utk berfutsal. Kalo balik ruma, kompem futsal atas katilll...yang adooo. Uh smbg mopping + gardening la! Cauwa.

Paediatrics

It's been a month since i've been in this dept...hummmm...do I like it...hmmm...I quite like it..cause fortunately I had two good mo's...yeah..they dun treat me as as a houseman but as a colleague..great isn't it..but yeah..sum thing I do not like about here..mmm...some of the mo' are like having excessive estrogen or or progestrone...hum.tah..they sound silly sometimes..scolding ppl without no reason..ah yeah some of em..err...specialist mostly...are not married!!!! Deng Mengg...y arrr?ok I might sound exaggerating things out...but yeah most of them..hahahah!ok..ramzi remind me earlier..if yu choose to be a pediatrician..yu should have be ready to get marry late!ok now I believe yu!hahahaha Ok..today is my active day.new case come..I clerk..I present.5 pm..chow!!!! Cheerss... .assalamualaikum.

4th posting: PAEDIATRIC

Day 1.

Arrived at 11am in the morning. Register here and there, filled up this and that.
Called up the specialist who take care of houseman, and she said "i'll see yu when i see yu in the ward"
like, errr ok..specialist (always like that) bla bla

ok, there yu go. 2 months in general paeds, 1 month in paeds onco/daycare, 1 month in NICU (codepink).
And finish, senang kan (kepale hotak kaw)

Got PINK team! Lead by Prof Wu (they said she's nice), Dr Ng (specialist - she introduce herself to me..hmm not bad :), Dr Khurul, Chow, Boekhren, Joyce (the MOs). erm, so far, Joyce macam kerek. Khurul mcm ok. Chow best (i knew her since OnG) and Boekhren, ok kot?hehe.

Today, a good starting..no PINK labels on the patient's board! (which is no patient at all) haaha!i like. Welcoming me to this kanak2 riang world kan?

My team-mate - Fazrul. Macam biase, dgn muke ketat die..langsong tak orientate aku pagi td. Say hi pon tak, Ngok. Ptg bru nampak btg hidong, mase tu aku da mati kutu stress sorang2. Nasib bek ade Kak Dell, kalo tak aku da simbah hydrogen peroxide atas muke ktat ko tu Fazrul. Nasib baik wife ko baik. Kalo tak lagi skali aku simbah asid..garang ni!

Ow ok. Fuh fuh, smoge esok akan bahagia.

Thanks to MooCow, yogurt yg sdap. And thanks baby hero, sbb tman destresskan diri. Hehe. Sayang yu aw aw.

cheers..
.assalamualaikum.

New 4-month life.

That's it. Holiday is over! And now, this morning i'm preparing myself for the new posting. Which is..PAEDS?ED?ORTHOPEDICS? Which one, depends. Hope to get the paeds, as my previous posting was all about mom and  infants and la la la. Ok chalo.

I'm wondering, which difficulties level will this new posting be in..MEDICINE?SURGERY?OnG?hum..nobody knows.

chalo.
.assalamualaikum.

Sunday flies away.

Hey, woke up @ 11am.  Mama knocked my room's door, saying papa and her going for open houses, itu ini..am went to gym. And abe still sleeping. Took shower, BBMing Faeda the bongek, met up at Rashid's. Potpet a bit, chauu. Berchenta at Stw for few hours, then went home. Made baked macaroni, watched Momok and here i am, blogging @1230am. Deng meng, so fast wey! And tomorrow m going to be so un-decidable. If  Dr Ixora signed my precious logbook, then there i go. Starting back my so-called workaholisticshitty life AGAIN. If she never sign yet, like aww..Holiday for one more day! yeash!
err, ok.

                                                this is Faeda and her sangat beautiful fren ;)

ho ho ho.
.assalamualaikum.

It's a TEST, not a luck.

The decision has arrived. It's the starting point.

Dont worry, we'll go through it. It's just a matter of time.

We're so completely so able to sooo make it!

And its not a bad luck, its just a small test for us. Really small compared to others.

cheeeerrss.

.assalamualaikum.

SHOPPING.

Hye.
Says Oprah, 1 in 20 women spent on something they dont really need.
Why?
1) they shop under emotional influences (stress, depressed)
2) they didnt bring their list to groceries store
3) they walk along the aisle just to HAVE A LOOK AROUND
4) they didnt check their account bills, cards outstanding unpaid balance, card;s limit left - before they go shopping
5) they didnt shop like men - go to the store, grab their stuff, pay the bills and left

Avoiding shopping is as easy as ABC - but when it comes to me, its difficult as XYZZZzz bla blaaa...aduh!!

haiyo.
.assalamualaikum.

SOME PEOPLE ARE JUST **tutt**

For God sake, i double-parked my car with my phone number on the dashboard and some more you asked my."why the hell should i call you?" like..err...

That's the story. When some narrow-minded, modernized city folks cant just think as much as other ppl think. Staring on ppl (for just double parked your car!)as they had killed some of your stupid mother father loh! Ayyo. Dey, go back to yo hometown lah!

uh, i forgot. Maybe they felt angry at me because my face just looks like their ex-employer who just threw them away from the employee's list?oh sorry for that!ORRR..did they just told yu that yu are having HIV positive. pity yuu..BLUEK BLUEK. blablabla...like..haha..if thats the reason why you get so angry..i forgive yuu! muaahaha..mua HA HA HA.

see you.
.assalamualaikum.

Today.

Time goes by. Lin's married. Got pregnant!Jok's getting engage. Alan's had been 'risik'ED by torres. Maz, Sulas, A'an and Sam..and myself?still planning planning planning. Hehehe.
Me and hafiz.
We plan to get married soon. yeah, seriously we do think of getting our kids together. Live together. Do everything together. I cant wait! Money? Boleh dicari. Bak kate org, kalo asyik pk duit, smpi lebam kau tak kawen.
Uh, i just love him so much. I just cant live without him.God!
If sometimes there's some jealousness occur between us, Darling i just want you to know, its just because i just want you to be with me (yeah i know you will :) NO DOUBT.. (i would smack all the stupid ladies out there who's trying to interfere. SERIOUSLY - cause they should KNOW, they're just a piece of smelly dumbassisss RUBBISH)
Owh ok.
How's the feeling of buying barang2 hantaran together?AWWWWWWWWWW! so sweet!
Cant wait!! (again) kling kling kling.

Chaw.
.assalamualaikum.

THE END.

i finished O&G.
i finished O&G.
im so damn very damn damn HAPPY.
that's all i know.

goodbye labour room calls. goodbye all stupid medico legal.
goodbye all crazy VE. good bye all amniotic fluids.

SO well~

chEErs.
.assalamualaikum.

O'N'G = OMG!

It's been 3 days. Of ME being in OnG posting. Ppl said this is the most worriest, scariest place among other posting. Too early too judge. Looks scary after they put me in 1 week-tagging period with 3 EOD (every-other-day) call). You oncall yesterday, and you oncall back tomorrow. Boleh? :'(
   Anyway, lots of things to learn BACK. Since i'm Moscow grad, so many new 'beranak' terms to be learnt. Oh, not to be forgetten. All the midwives in labour room are SOMETHING. Some kind of psychosis kot?haihh..screaming to new taggers like they're the only one having damn stupid voice.
  Anyway, lets forget about it.
  So many things i need to cope up. From the knowledge, skills and environment. From how to conduct a baby, all the sequences after the delivery. All must be done with serious care. VERY care. If not, you will end up with writing an incident letter. Ouch. So far, ok la. I did my own delivery at 5 am yesterday, with one midwife yg sgt baik..! She taught me how to conduct a baby step by step. But i still slowly learning how to jahit the vagina. Ok, good sign ok. I was so GELI with all those MYSELF thingy tu before, but i slowly get used to it since i started with my OnG posting. Slowly...slowly..haish!~
  Oh, and the best part was, i already SNAPPED A CORD during my first call..!aduh..the placenta was so hard to remove and tight as well. So i just try to pull it out, ended up with CORD SNAP. And  Jui dgn slumberland nye berkate, " Baguslaa Iznee, aku tak pernah tgk real Cord Snap..". Bongok Jui.huhuhu..
  Wuargh~Zzzz.. Tomorrow oncall, sleep la now. tata.

ChEErs..
.assalamualaikum.

woman : emotional MORE.

Women tend to be more emotional than men.
Yeah.
Tonight, i feel myself annoying. Yes, my own-self. Why:
- lately i easily get annoyed by something/anything/anyone.
- i can't keep my patient longer than before.
- i hate to be around some ppl (some white-coloured skin, mata sepet) - i dont mean to be racist, but this is true. They're ANNOYING! especially this Cheras area (drove their fucking stupid exclusive car like this is their stupid motherfather's road)
- i easily increase my voice when speaking to those i love.
- i feel lost
- i feel stupid
- i feel darkness around.
(shyt, is this symptoms of depression?)

Argh. what happened.

Change Iznee change. Maybe i should get more rest? WTF. i had enough rest.

ergh!

reflexiOlgy.

huuuuu...dis is waT I call relaxinG! tamBah2 lagi when yU have to Oncall The nexT day.hehe. oncall. wisH cud write a letTer to anY of KKM's peep, requEstinG for NO ONCALLs! for soMe reason..(Like..allergic tO oncall?)..wee! haih, anYhow, noT a sinGle doctOr caN escape froM it.seriOusly!

AnYwey, had mY day fuLL of fun tOday..wenT oUt wif beebee yG gile mMg taK pnaH buaT our datinGness day boring!haih, bile nK kawen ni..like seriousLy. everyBodys gettin enGaGed.married.havinG own hapPy life.kalO hapY dgN famiLy sniriK je tkpe.nih sibOk2 tY akU ble nK kawen sUme.nmind2..koranG kaweN la Puas2 duLu..nati bLe aku



kawen..kOranG da expired da ms tu.hehehehehhe.

AnYwey, like He said..he's Gona stUck to Me like glue..yeah, and m goNa stucK to hiM like forever! ya LublU tebya babe!




ChEErs..
.AssalamUalaikum.

new intrapostiNg team

UrolOgy.!!!
Hehe..tHe questiOn is : whY is it owez..I aM alOne durinG ONE-ward postinG..? Like in med 6, med 3.hum hum.
BUt its ok.
SumtyMe feel like workinG alOne in One ward wud Be mUch
Better.kot? buT if there's lini ,syazana..it wud Be mUchhhhh moreeeeeee better!!!!
Ok ok. urolOgy. yeah m alone Here for 2 weeks. and goiNg for HepatO team nxt. luckY its noT an OT week.if not,I DIE. serioUsly. but next week..I DIE.cause its OT weeK. and for The trilliOn time, m gOna die aLone. buwek2. staff nUrse kT surg 3 baek2 aja.oh yes for sUre akU bOle msoKkan CBD gne kaki saje after 2 weeks timw.kan??hahaha! wuh! esoK oncll. nK tido la!


ChEErs.
.AssalamUalaiUm.

hOme!

HOme finaLLy.after 8 Hours of alOr StaR - KL journeY.woo. mcm waY t0 KelanTan kot.anYwey, had fuN in Kedah. celebRatinG new-comEr into oUr famiLy. welcoMe ijat! haVe fun with us.HEHE..coNgratUlatiOnsss hanis & ijaT. zzZZzzz..Gona da da Now. TomolO got uroLogy to suffer with.hehe. nYtey malazia!

CHeeRs..
.AssalaMualaikUm.

mYhaniS geTtinG enGaged today!

CoNgratUlatioNs babe!! Uh.wa yG kapeL 6 tahOn..lU yg tunanG lU..ape cer??hahaha! AnYwey, I'm deM haPpy for yu. BerakhirlaH sudaH pncariaN pasangan idOp spuPu akU ni.sungguH indah ceritenye!hahah.abG tenTera yaw! Haha! AnyweY, woKe uP today with fuLL of releaseNess.finishInG coLorectaL is a verY big satisfactiO to me! GOinG tO urology and hepAtoBiliarY for 11 weeks..tHeN tere yU go! Finishhingg surgery!!

chEErs..
.Assalamualaikum..e

im OperaTing!

iM nOt acTually 0PeratinG. but AssiSting!hahahah.. 3 OT coNtinuOUSly in 4 hOuRs..RetRActinG tHose bla bla (i canT remEmBer eVerY each oF thOSe surgical InstrumenTs la!). Hernia repAir, trachaL cyst remOvaL, LipomA removal. Lucky we duN Hev tYme for 2Nd Hernia. if Not i wiLL be stuck there like..EVER! uhh...waT i like abOut OT?
I LIKE THE OT SUIT. bole bwk tido!
anYwey, OT was fuN. i leaRnt a lOt. buT i wiSh i cud see tHis oNe Operation. PERICARDIECTOMY. How DatO raMzi And ProF Zamrin saFe mY pApa for his pericaditiss!
One day.
i wisH.

chEErs..
.assalaMuaLaikum.

owhh he's sO sweet!

lyKe o-mY-gOd.we wenT tO kLcc for YOgi BeaR today. WhIle waitinG for hiM doing sum stuff  at the atm, I had My quick lOok on tHe barbie dolls (mY old-tyme favourite err untiL nOw btw..) At the tOys'®'us.I was attracted to this oNe barbie witH pinK guitar and with her cute pUrple mini skirt..Ɲ  was thinKing of buying it. tHen, my boyfie came in. tOld him I wnT to buy this one (I can expecT his funnY-lOoking face when I told him that). yeas, he smiled. gElenG2 kpale a bit. anD tOok the barbie froM me and straighT away to the cashier. paid. I was like..errr...what? he paid the barBie doll? serious Ke? (I can't even believe it, he din eveN asked me Lotsa quests, no bebelan..)..haha! and then, after that.I realize, that he reallY levs me. hehehehhe. he knOw really levs barbie since small, ad never kept mY eyes Off the barbie dolls everytime I saw em. huh, lucky I am to have him. I lev hafiz  so much, noone wud ever knOw hOw much lev this guy!!muah2!!



ChEErs..
.AssalamUalaikum.

daY 4 suRgery dEpt.

MontH-5 of life..
ReaLLy taught me hOw tO b patienT. spending my tiMe for peoPle i never meT before. explOrinG their life history. makiNg peoPle comfortabLe by mY way of tellinG their family's sick condition. makinG sick people smiLe knowinG that they can gO hOme after days of injections and all boring ward stuff?
But, do theY ever knoe how mucH house officers suffer durinG their day of life?scolded bY seniors for thinGs they never did, thinG they never kNoe? hum, but its ok. its nOt going to be my way of teachinG my houseman later. I'm goinG to b gOod..reaL good..I promise.


HUrm..mY surgery postinG. so far so good. lUcky I have Nice colleagUe in my coLorectaL team. lini anD dEen. they tauGht me lots abOut adapting to tO ppl's ass and stUff. and all those shittY smell, has been mY new aroma..ugh ugH..gOd kNoes..haha! anYwey, specialisT and reG and are all good. hOpe la. I don't wanT tO hope mUch. hehe. anywey, surrouNdinG is Great. lOts of hOuseman from different teams. oh ya, paan bongoK also is in suRgery. uh, in endocrine and BREASTTT summore..he musT be haPPy guess?hahhaha!
Uh..okla. gona SambOng later!

ChEErs..
.AssalaMualaikum.

hOlidey's cominG to its end..

Haihhh..haih...2 weeks of Day off are not enuFF for 4 months of nOnstOp workinG moNths..crazy? its moRe thaN thaT ican say..2 weekS full of relaxatiOns. shopping in bandunG. spendinG days wif boyfie with BowlinG and archery. new bB Bold 3. haviNg aLL bills n payMenTs settled. and tHe most important thinG - woKe uP late in the morninG! ayayai. nver BeeN dis happY yawl..! uhhh...bUt...m goinG to starT working again dis Monday...for another 4 months..nOnstOp..bUt i hope..I will have mY weekends off in suRgery..I hOopeeee!!plsssssss..heheheheheh..uh oH....anywey..lev typing usinG dis new keypad..aww awww!!hehehh

ChEErs.
.AssalamUalaikum.







d

keep sHOpping keep sHoppinG!

lyke oMG! i cant stop my strong desire tO shop!! serioUsly..wheN mOnth coMe to its enD, then the NO-MONEY feelinG burniiiinnnnngg insideee..!hoooyeh!howww la..tO sTop..this is noo goOd at all..today..i sPent like 200+ for La Senza onli..nObodY seesss it anywey..wHy shOuld i spent lots and lots on it??haiya..then, i answer myself..saTisfactionn! yes, thats it. i shOp for myself, not for oTher ppl to see what i bOught, what brand i use... cOnfident..?yes, my boy owez asKed me, whats the diff using branded and nON-branded stuff. and i said, "i feel confident on it!" btol ke?sum ppl said, nonsense..! i said, up to yu! mY confidence, not yoUrs! heeeeee!m the one whO use it, not yu! heheheh..what laa i mraPu..gtg..GOnna get sum sleep..toMolo got verY importanT stuff tO do! weee!

chEErs..
.assalaMUalaikum.

baNDuNg!

yes! nOw i kNOe wHy pPl's eye ShineS wHEn i tOld em m Going tO baNDuNg! Burberry. Gucci. LV. ChaneL. fred pERry. Armani exChaNGe! thaT made Our moNey fLew AwaY. ho ho! owh, and im Surprised, wHen papa Said nothinG at all wHen we SpeNT like A LOT (seriously) of rinGgit tO shop! fuH fuh! anD m so going To JalaN riaU and DagO again wHeneVer i wenT to baNDung. jUst to shOp. like seriOuSly. temPorary streSs relief. yeahhh at least.. afTer been traPPed in the hOspital for alMOst 4 monthssss and nOn-stOp. haihh..anD the besT part was when we tOgetherly sHop for mY coUsin's weddinG dresss and ouR theme coLOurs for her weddinG is golddd..wahh!hanisssss gettinG married..!seloNoknyee..!aaaa aNd they kepT asking me wheN is mY turn?and i said, ask him!hehehehehhehehhe..levyu boy.hehehhe..oh yes, the spa. very relaxiNg..man! thanKs to pak muslih. our loyaL drivers.

im Gona miss all The facTory Outlets, mee Tek-tek, mee Kocok, ahli gigi, and lott more!

ONe doWn. 5 tO gO.

YeaH. m FiniShinG Medical depT sOOn. After 4 SuffferinG-mOntHs of mY earliesT Life. SufferinG kaH? yeaH, tell Me AbOUt it.
1) YOU've NObOdy tO crY tO durinG yO Hard times (when yu AcTUalLy heV to cOVer tHe warD aLONE.yeah aLONe)
2) yoU gOna be The dunGU-est PersoN in the waRd wHen yO seniORs cOMplaininG shYTs in FroNT of yO warD SpecialisT (whiLe yO sPeciaList was daMN satisFied wif yO work)
3) TheY Never APpreciaTE eVerY sINgLe thinG i did.. (yU Did This anD THaT, yu laTE a lil bit - YOU LEMBAB! ) bOleh?
4) i LoVe mY jOB. bUT tHey NeVeR aLLOw ME tO proVe MYself.

i Used tO gO ouT to THe corridOr, crY MyselF oUt. THinkinG y m ChOosinG this waY. mY HeaRT said, thiS is tHe waY. i Oni heV this in My life. jusT go ON.  i hATE workiNG in sUrroUNding where all the peoPle mAde a ruBbish looK at Me. hah!~ mcM ko BagUs sgt kan?

BUT, mY PapA said. EnJOY tHe mOmenT.
yeas paPa, m enJoyinG The moMent.
God, heLp me wiTh this. i reaLLy Need the StrenGth.

chEErs.
.assalaMualaikum.